Friday, January 12, 2007

Another Do

This hair stuff is no joke!! There is a Yahoo group for trans racial adoptive parents that is totally dedicated to skin and hair care. I think that begins to illustrate the size of the challenge. I am trying to learn about which products work best and which products to avoid; what to do to help Grace's hair and skin, and what not to do because it will damage them. Yes, I did say DAMAGE! In the past week, I have read about hair breaking off, falling out, even ceasing to grow. I have read about bumps, rashes and scales on scalps, elbows, faces, etc. I used to think my sensitive skin and fine textured hair were a pain to deal with. It turns out, I had it pretty darn easy compared to this. I am willing to learn, but am clueless and confused when I stand in the middle of the hair product aisle at the store. So, I've decided it's time to enlist the help of the professionals. I called a local salon that specializes in "black" hair yesterday. I felt kind of silly trying to explain my situation (you know, the clueless white Mom with a sweet little brown baby that is developing a serious case of uncontrollable hair), but after a little chuckle, the man gave me the personal cell phone number of their stylist, Shamika. He assured me that she would be more than happy to answer all my questions, meet with me to teach me about products and styling techniques, and of course, provide "beauty" services as needed. If ever there was an answer to prayer, this was it!!


chou-chou said...

Grace looks beautiful! I'm a member of that Yahoo group for hair/skin care, even though I don't even have my kid home... trying hard to learn as much as I can now, because I'm also a clueless White woman. :-)

Mommy said...

Oh boy! I am in trouble I will have two little girls and one of the will already need this lovin. Yikes! I am not ready since I have been going crazy with just adoption stuff.

Renee said...

She is so CUTE! It looks like you are doing a great job with her hair!

Have you found a skin lotion that you love? I haven't. I have a drawer full of discards. Our one son has such dry and sensitive skin.


Amanda/MayhemMama said...

Glad to see you back!

Grace looks lovely, as always.

Good luck with your hair endeavors. It must be a real challenge-- I have been overwhelmed and I have boys with short hair! The boys go to a barber every few weeks now, and that has been wonderful. I hope Shamika and the rest of the salon will be able to answer some questions, set you on the right track with some tips, and give you confidence. You're doing great so far!!

smiliesar said...

I so glad you found someone to help you out. Grace's hair looks so cute!

darci said...

you crack me up. I would join you in the clueless aisle, believe me! It looks like you are doing a pretty great job anyway! I am impressed. :) I can't believe how much Grace looks like she is growing. TIme flies...

owlhaven said...

She looks awesome!!

Mary, mom to many

Sheryl said...


I regularly read your blog as well as those of others that have adopted Ethopian children. It is so wonderful to see that the children have been taken into homes and given the love and care that they deserve. I am also glad that the care of your child's hair and skin is something that you take seriously and that you are seeking help early on. I'm making generalizations but, Black hair needs moisture added to it, so daily or frequent washing dries it out. Additional moisture and conditioning is also needed. The same also holds true for Black skin. White hair needs daily or frequent washing because it generally becomes oilier as times goes by. Of course curlier hair takes more time and patience to comb through and style, than does straighter hair. So each type of hair needs different care...more of this, less of that. I'm saying this because I'd like to caution you about using words such as "challenge" and "tame" especially when talking about hair. Please be senstive when talking about your journey and experiences learning how to care for your child's hair and skin. There are many messages out there that gives Black children the idea that their skin and hair is less desirable than those of Whites. You don't want those coming from the home as well.

And generally speaking, the brown skin that needed a bit of additional care early on ages so much better. It's evident when you see 40, 50, or 60 year-old Black people with skin that still is as smooth as a 20 year old!

I apologize if I came across as judgemental, harsh, or offensive. I wasn't meaning to.

Erin O' said...

Grace looks lovely, and super happy.

I just found a couple of blogs by AA women talking all about natural black hair. One is called Nappturology 101 and is at And the other is This one has great photos and directions for creating the styles, and they both talk a lot about natural hair products (as opposed to chemical ones) and how to care for hair. I only just discovered them, but they look really helpful.