Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Am I OK???

Simply.....I'm trying.

Life has been tough for quite some time now. First, there was the news that my Mom had breast cancer. Then, Bob's journey through brain cancer began. It was very hard not to let these two things intertwine in my head. My heart breaks for Bob and his family, but the same fate is not expected for my Mom. Praise God!.....I guess? I joyfully claim the miracle that our Lord did in my Mom's life, but I am beyond perplexed when I consider that Bob's children will have to finish growing up without a Dad.

Shortly after my Mom's diagnosis, my Mom's oncologist recommended that my siblings and I be tested for the breast cancer genes (BRCA 1 & 2). I immediately called up my doctor. She agreed that it was a good plan, and got right to the business of figuring out how to word the referral to convince the Medical Group to cover the test (at a cost of about $3500). In the mean time, she gave me a referral to get a mammogram. This would be my first, and baseline mammogram, as I am only 31 years old. Typically, women are not encouraged to start getting mammograms until they are 40 years old.

On May 4, I went for my mammogram. In spite of some of the horror stories I've heard, it really wasn't a big deal. A quick apology to my male readers....I know that all of us women have more "sensitive" times of the month, but the mammogram just wasn't that big of a deal. Ladies, I have some good sized boobs too!!! I get the whole "vice" reference, but the level of discomfort was not worth skipping the potential lifesaving value of the test. Go get your mammograms!!!!!!!!!!

Now for the icky part. Last week, I got a call from my doctor's office. It seems that my mammogram showed some abnormalities in a lymph node in my right breast. Now, I know that it is probably nothing. I had a clogged milk duct that was needle biopsied and aspirated shortly after kid #2 quit nursing. I also had a fibrous cyst that required ultrasound before child #3 was conceived. It turned out to be nothing. However, my Mom had all these things too at points in her life, and still ended up with breast cancer. I'm not saying that my faith has become weak, but I am human none the less. I go in for a "spot compression" on Friday. They will be taking more x-rays and an ultrasound. I would so appreciate your prayers. This is scary stuff!!!

19 comments:

Wendy said...

You will be in my prayers Blaine!

Wendy from Flippin' Sweet

Louise said...

I'll be praying!!
Hope you have a good week!!

S&C said...

Wow like life isn’t stressful enough for you. You will be in my thoughts!

Karianne said...

I'm here for you hon. I'm glad that you updated us, as I was starting to get worried about you!

Anonymous said...

Your worry is totally understandable. It doesn't mean your faith is weak, and I don't think anyone reading would think that at all.

I'll be thinking of you!

angie said...

I will pray for you. It is scary stuff- I hate cancer. Keep the faith.

Anonymous said...

I will pray for you. I can totally understand your feelings, but that doesnt make your faith weak...

Lean on Him.. He's a big God after all..
Heather

Anonymous said...

You will definitely be in my thoughts and I'll be sending only good and happy thoughts your way.

I hate the word "abnormal" - it scares the crap out of us when most of the time it is usually nothing.

By the way, I had a breast lump removed when I was only 18 - it ended up being nothing. 18, 40, you never know. Keep your chin up!

jamie

Jane (a.k.a. patjrsmom) said...

When you turn to God and say, "I need you. I can't do this alone and I'm scared," He doesn't question your faith, but rather lifts you up and wraps you in His loving arms and replies, "Do not be afraid, I am with you."

I wrote about it during our adoption wait here in word and song.

Godspeed my friend,
Jane

PastormacsAnn said...

I will definitely be praying for your Blaine. Hang in there.

Perri said...

Blaine, so glad to hear from you. I'm going to be praying for your peace of mind and good results.

Nadine said...

I pray that God would protect you and bring healing to your body. I pray that everything will turn out just fine.

Anonymous said...

Blaine, I'll be thinking of you and hoping for good news -- lots and lots of virtual hugs coming your way.

shelly said...

praying for you and thinking about Jeremiah 29:11 ....

Jessica said...

I'll be praying for you Blaine! Waiting for answers is the tough part.

Brianna Heldt said...

Blaine I'll be praying, I am so sorry. Please do keep us updated.

writex3 said...

Yes, this is scary stuff. You have both my support and my prayers.

Anonymous said...

I'm thinking of you.

My mom was diagnosed the middle of last year with a termincal cancer (treatable for a period, but uncurable).

A few months after her diagnosis, I had a swollen lymph node under each arm.

My mind raced a thousand miles an hour with the what ifs.

It is hard when your mother, the person who has always been such a rock, gets 'caught' by cancer. It really makes you stop and think how fragile life can be. Then to get something yourself during that period really makes your mind wander.

I had an u/s on my nodes and they told me it was 'nothing'. Hoping the same thing happens with you.

erin said...

Sorry for being away so long... as always, my thoughts are with you and your family. I'm sure everything will turn out well.

e